3 Strategies For Dealing With Major Setbacks & Injustices

September 05, 2017 , 6 minutes read , By Alan Belkin



3 Strategies For Dealing With Major Setbacks & Injustices

It is hard to fathom at first, but some of life’s seemingly greatest injustices are life’s greatest gifts.

In your life, think back to a time where you have experienced a great injustice. A great wrong was done to you. Something that you never expected.

It can be something recent or old.

For one moment ask yourself, how did this thing serve me, help or assist me in getting to where I am today? Or if it is something that is particularly recent, ask yourself, how could this potentially be the best thing that ever happened to me?

I know from experience this question is perhaps one of the hardest questions to answer when in an emotional state, where hormones are flooding the body.

But take a moment an identify some events that you once perceived as absolutely awful that have become major stepping stones in your career, relationships, finances, spiritual journey.

Think back to an event that caused you real hurt and upset. Now, how did that event change the path you were on in life? How did that serve you?

When you identify a few major events that are ‘bad’ at the time and see that in fact they set you on a ‘good’ path, you can begin applying that same logic to the rest of your life and free up emotional baggage.

It is as close to a quick panacea as you can get.

You see, the net sum of all injustices become clear at the end of our lives when we are on our final breath, our final moment of life passing through our finger tips.

In that moment as the breathe leaves our body and our eyes feel heavy and tired, all you are left with is the experience and memories of moments of love and joy you once felt.

It is simply a matter of sitting back right now and closing your eyes. Go to a time where someone you loved passed away. Go to the funeral, where you saw all the photos of them with their family and the tremendous impact that this one human being had on the lives of everyone around them.

You see, in that moment, you were present to pure joy and love for the contribution they made. The same I promise will occur in your life.

No matter what you have done or what has been done to you, in some way those events have contributed to your life and created the destiny you leave behind.

The most challenging moments are the most formative. They create the deepest imprints into our psyche, character and soul. But those moments also shape the direction our life takes.
Whatever we run from takes us from one place to another place, where we find something worth living for.

Every bad relationship has got us a little closer to knowing what we do want.

Every difficult negotiation has taught us a little more about human behaviour and what drives us.

Every penny or fortune lost has demonstrated our character is greater than the circumstances and our material possessions.

Every death has reinforced the value of life and re-contextualised and reminded us of what is truly meaningful and important.

Every argument with a loved one has caused us to introspect and revaluate our values and what is truly important.

Victor Frankl in his great book a “A Man’s Search For Meaning” wrote that it is not what happens to you that determines your life, that you have no choice over, but you always have the choice about what you make it mean.

That is the last of the human freedoms that we have left even if we are imprisoned. We always have the choice to decide what we make our circumstances mean. We all have the choice about what we make our suffering mean.

In my life on a daily basis there is something that inevitably causes me to feel emotional, upset, angry, in a rage. There is an inevitability to this.

But the one choice I do have, is the meaning I assign to each and every passing moment.
It is wise to not let the rules of society around you determine what is or is not an injustice, do not live in a prison of meaning made by others.

Create the meaning that is there to empower you and recognize that absolute good and bad do not exist, it is on the labels that we place onto things that determines their impact and effect on us.

So in summary here are the 3 things you can do to take great injustices and a state of being defeated to a place of strength, courage and gratitude:

1. Train your mind to see the good that has come of bad past events. Go through 3 or 4 major events you felt were setbacks in your life and see how they have helped you today.

2. Ask yourself how your current situation could perhaps become one of the greatest things that has ever happened to you. Come up with a few plausible answers.

3. Stay present to your own death or mortality. You will soon pass on. Thinking from the point of view at the end of your life, can you see how this event has served you or helped you.

About The Author

Alan